“Confess your sins one to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” James 5:16

“If you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.” Matthew 6:15

Conflicts between good people do arise. We are flawed. None of us is yet perfected. What do we do when we have been wronged, when we get into an argument, when we are accused of something we did not do

Here’s a formula that has worked for me through the years, and seems to help me walk stronger through life, not that I have always done this perfectly, but it is the formula which I believe should belong to all of us.

If 95% percent of the problem lies with the other person, and only 5% from me, I want to forgive the 95% and confess the 5%. And when I confess the 5%, I must not add, “But if you hadn’t… I wouldn’t have.” That’s just another form of self- justification and accusation of the other person.

There does not seem to me ever to be a problem between people where 100% of the problem belongs to one party. That party may have started the problem, but our response when we are maligned or accused or gossiped about or hurt is never perfect. So I could really say, “If 99% of the problem belongs to the other party and only 1% to me, then my role is to forgive the 99% and ask forgiveness for the 1%. This does not mean that I will begin to trust or maybe will ever trust the offender, but I have released him or her and have confessed my own part of the problem or my flawed response.

Do you have a problem confessing your faults?

Learn to claim your part in the disagreement or argument, and quickly to forgive the other person.

Enjoy life more as you follow Jesus and abide in His Word.